14 RED FLAGS IN DATING
Me and the homies talked about red flags a couple nights ago and so many red flags popped up in my mind. One of em I will not say on here. I’ll write a whole separate post on that but here are some red flags that alarm me personally. Add some if you wanna.
Music is such a big deal. Me, Moe, and Steve talked about this a couple nights ago. As Steve N. Clair stated that night “You can see somebody personality through their iTunes Library.” It’s true as fuck. If someone has trash music taste that’s only half a red flag cause you can save them by putting them on some wavy shit. It’s a whole red flag if they’re not open to give any music outside of what they listen to a try. That’s where you gotta possibly ejecto seato cuz. Anybody who not open to trying anything new is someone you need to question being around.
People who keep too many tabs on you. It’s cool to know what I’m doing here and there but when a mothafucka gotta know where I’m at every fucking second of everyday and they want me to drop everything I’m doing to give them attention. Yeah suwoop flag right there. One, that’s a sign of selfishness, two, how the fuck am I going to build a Roc-A-Fella type company laid up with you every time I get free time? Let me tell you the shorty’s that are like this but how they adjust this to not being a red flag. The shorty that wants you around all the time and understands you’re busy and asks to come watch you work or offers to help you is the keeper. I Know you could say “She just trying to spy on you” which could be true but you could tell if that’s the case immediately. I’ll gladly bring my laptop and have a shorty help me write on my blog. I can also help them with whatever they got going on. We kill 2 birds with one stone cause we spending time together and working on each other’s passions.
Sharing everything with social media really makes me wanna jump out a window. If we have a private conversation I don’t wanna see a recap of the convo on twitter. I don’t give a fuck if my name wasn’t said. It’s the principle. That’s between us. Sometimes it’s cool but when a person does it every time yall speak to each other or hang with each other it gets annoying. I don’t need to let the world know who I’m out on a date with or chilling with. It’s a sign of respect to me. It’s not because I’m trying to be secretive it’s because we’re building a bond. What the fuck does that have to do with people on social media and why should we share it with them. Might as well bring them on the dates too. Damn. This in the same category of people who be sharing all their overly emotional feelings on social media whether things going their way with a person they like or not. There’s no reason why I should know your whole love life in your tweets. I’m not trying to sound heartless but social media is the worst place to vent those emotions. Talk to a friend you trust about that shit. It feels 100x better than telling social media that shit. First these people be begging in their tweets, then be so in love/like in the tweets, then sounding super needy, clingy, and thirsty in the tweets. Then sad as fuck in the tweets. Go to therapy. I’m not even trying to be funny. These type of people fuck around hurt somebody or harm themselves cause they’re mentally not stable. Get help. I promise I’m not emotionless I just funnel my emotions into my hobbies and I just continue living. I love myself too much to trip off how people feel or don’t feel about me.
Someone who quickly wants to cuff you is alarming. They want to get serious fast as fuck. Why are you making subtweets about me after hanging out once? I’m flattered but I’m scared too because I don’t really know you and you don’t really know me. This is the climate of dating in society right now. It’s starts off with a DM, then texting, then you hang out, then it’s I like you I want us to be exclusive. Everybody so quick to try and lockdown somebody like damn you only hung out one time. Have some fun. What’s the rush? People who try to rush into relationships do it so they can hide their insecurities and flaws before the person they’re interested in sees them and becomes uninterested. It’s kinda like entrapment. People like this are also needy and clingy as fuck. Look, I’ve been in love and it’s great but I believe it’s even better when you take your time. How can a human hang with someone 3 times and decide “Okay this person is the one” is beyond me. Truth be told I hate getting to know women because that means I gotta pay for dates and dates are cool but when I feel like I wasted a date I be PISSED! One, I could’ve stayed home and listen to Reasonable Doubt and drank some wine. Two I feel like I got finessed and if there’s anything that will get me to not fuck with people is if I feel they played me like a sucka ass nigga. But that’s the risk I gotta take to get to know someone. As long as I get to truly know them I’m good with that.
Any woman with a clean car. GET THE FUCK OUT *St.Louis from The Players Club voice* Red fucking flag. A woman with a clean car will stare at you while you sleep and potentially think about wrapping a plastic bag around your head and then lay her head on your chest and take a nap over your lifeless body.
People who can’t communicate like adults are the worst. If you notice that a person would rather win the argument than fix the issue then you’re with a child. You’re babysitting. You’re not growing. It’s not supposed to be a contest of “Who can give a fuck less” the most. There’s a problem. We’re not agreeing on something so lets figure out a solution. Trying to hurt each other verbally or treat a disagreement like a rap battle is not helping anyone. You grown. People who drink Henny be on this type of shit. Also people who can’t communicate about emotions is a HUGE RED FLAG. Look I just told you about how it may seem like I’m emotionless. I’m not emotionless. I just have my emotions in check. Nobody can hurt me. Only death of my family hurts my feelings. Other people outside of that circle can try and hurt my feelings but I’ll be numb to it. After losing family to addiction or violence over and over, everything else isn’t that important to me. I can come back from someone talking bad and lying about me. Losing someone to death is a scar that is permanent and that affects me. Those experiences taught me to keep my emotions in check and express and talk about them like an adult. So when a person says they’re not into talking about their emotions that is pretty bad. I used to be that way and I can say that is not a great state of mind to have.
If your family don’t like em. then they washed up. Especially if your moms don’t like them. Now if you know yo momma fucked up then that don’t count. But if they can’t vibe with your family it’s all bad. If your family don’t ask about the person you with and what they’ve been up to then that means they weren’t feeling them and didn’t leave a good impression on them. This is well known but some people like to ignore this red flag the most and end up living in hell on earth. The person they with are jeopardizing their to-go plate missions. All fucking bad.
When people talk about their exes I listen really carefully but I ain’t tryna hear that shit 90% of the time. I don’t care if you talking bad about your ex. What the fuck does that gotta do with us right now? Like I said, sometimes it’s cool especially if you’re trying to prove a point or it’s an interesting story but always bringing up an ex whether it’s good or bad is a red flag. They still stuck in the past, hurt, and mentally haven’t healed yet.
When you always see a person name in some drama. Run. Whenever things get boring they gotta go start some shit. Gossiping. Everybody gossips in some way shape or form. I can understand celebrity gossip cause celebs have an allure about them but gossiping on people you know is a headache. Nothing is ever these people fault. They are never wrong. They cannot ignore people if their life depended on it. When I see people typing paragraphs on social media arguing, I assume you’re yelling at your phone while doing it and that makes you a psychopath in my book. You have too much time on your hands. Even if all the drama isn’t their fault that just means they’re unlucky and I can’t have that unluckiness spreading to me.
A person who’s the total opposite of what they portray online. That’s pretty self explanatory. If you funny online then dammit you better be funny in person. If you nasty online then dammit you better be nasty in person. If you’re nice and caring online then you better not be a jerk in real life. If you got a lot to say online you better not be shy as fuck when I see you. Don’t be fake.
A person who doesn’t show you much interest but still wants all of your attention. Man let me put my pastor robe on because I used to do this shit to women and it was some fuck nigga shit. I’m grown enough to admit when I did some fuck shit. I would lead women on and give them just enough attention to let them think that I was interested in them and then always break plans with them or hit them up at 1am to fuck. On the flip side of this women will show you just enough interest just to get dates out of you and then pretend to be annoyed when you stop taking them out on dates. You had it right the first time pal. Cut her off. Take the L and keep living. You’ll do better don’t even trip. The women should have cut me off too. I was an asshole. These types are always unavailable to you physically, emotionally, and mentally but they expect you not to be unavailable for them. They always wanna feel wanted because they’re broken people and they’re never upfront with you and tell you that they not feeling you.
A person who afraid to eat in front of people is a sneaky weird lil bitch. I don’t know why that bothers me so much but it does. Like I know you hungry. Why are you leaving meat on these chicken bones trying to be cute? I seriously do not trust people who do not eat in front of people on dates. You showing me that you would rather starve and look cute than eat good. Shows me your priorities fucked up.
Flakiness. If you flaky fuck you. I don’t care what type of relationship it is business or personal. When you fuck with my time and don’t respect my time I cannot be around you. I can let people being late slide but when shit gets cancelled last minute when I know very well it could’ve been cancelled well before that moment, I will not fuck with you after that. Some flaky mothafuckas won’t even tell you they cancelled shit until you fully dressed and out the house. Just say no to the plans and quit being a scary ass bitch.
Last but not least a controlling person. Control deez nuts in your mouth hoe and that’s all I’m a say about those bitches.
Peace.
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