10 REASONS WHY POLITE COOLERY IS THE BEST PODCAST

FIRST WE NEVER BEEN ON WEIRD SHIT WITH OUR WOMEN. NO STRIKES ON OUR JACKET. NOTHING BUT PROTECTING AND RESPECTING AND WE WRECKING WHOEVER DISRESPECTING. 

WHAT WEIRDOS ARE HAVING TROUBLE NORMALIZING NOW WE BEEN NORMALIZED. FROM THE GATE. THESE NIGGAS GOTTA STRUGGLING TO DO WHAT WE MAKE LOOK EASY. MATTER FACT WE NOT SAYING WEIRDO NO MORE CAUSE NOW THE WEIRDOS ARE CALLING PEOPLE WEIRDOS AND THAT’S WEIRD. 

WE THE SELF CARE GODS. WHEN WE SAID WE FUCKING WIT THE “CHAMOMILE” ALL THESE NIGGAS THOUGHT CHAMOMILE WAS A SHORTY THROWING ASS AT MAGIC CITY OR P-VALLEY. WHEN WE SAID WE “EXFOLIATE” ALL THESE NIGGAS THOUGHT WE WAS TALKING BOUT A MARVEL MOVIE SUPERVILLAIN. WE AIN’T FORGET YALL WAS SLANDERING BUBBLE BATHS UNTIL WE WERE TAKING EM WITH SHORTIES YALL HAD CRUSHES ON. THESE DIRTY ASS AXE SPRAY WEARING NIGGAS REALLY TRIED TO PLAY WIT OUR NAME BECAUSE A NIGGA LIKE TO TAKE BUBBLE BATHS WITH ISLEY BROTHERS ON THE PLAYLIST. YOU DUSTY NIGGAS WASH YOUR FACE WITH BAR SOAP AND IRISH SPRING. YOU NEED PERMISSION TO TALK TO US. WE IN ROSE CLAY FACE MASKS WATCHING SEASON 2 OF BARRY. 

YOU EVER SEEN TITTIES SO NICE AT A BED BATH AND BEYOND THAT YOU HAD TO INTRODUCE YOURSELF THEN GO SHOPPING FOR TOWELS? WE HAVE. 

YOU NOW SAY THE WORD TITTIES WITH PRIDE, HONOR, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY HAPPINESS. YOU’RE WELCOME! WE REMEMBER WHEN PEOPLE ASKED (AND BY PEOPLE WE MEAN NIGGAS/MEN CAUSE THEY WEAK) “IS ALL THEY TALK ABOUT IS TITTIES??” YES BITCH. WHO THE FUCK COMPLAIN ABOUT TITTIES? WHAT TYPE OF STRANGE SHIT YOU DORKS BE ON TO QUESTION TITTY TALK? THESE NIGGAS WEAKER THAN A RESTAURANT WHERE THE RANCH NOT HITTIN. 

IF ANY PODCAST WOULD BE ON THE NEXT GRAND THEFT AUTO GAME IT’LL BE US AND YOU FUCKIN KNOW IT! 

WE HOLD THE RECORD IN THE GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS FOR BEING TOLD “YOU SMELL TOO GOOD” BY THE MOST WOMEN IN ONE NIGHT. 119 DOUBLE HUGS TO ADD TO THE STATS. WE SMELL LIKE PARADISE. WE SMELL LIKE WE’RE PANTHER OWNERS. WE SMELL LIKE MIMOSAS AND FRESHLY COOKED WAFFLES. 

POLITE COOLERY PODCAST IS LIKE JAY-Z PERFORMING THE FIRST DEAD PRESIDENTS AND IMAGINARY PLAYERS AT THE TUNNEL IN 1997. WE TALK TO THE HUSTLERS. WE REPRESENT THE SOLID. WE STAND FOR THE PEOPLE WHO SKIN ALWAYS SHINING LIKE PRIME NIA LONG IN LOVE JONES. 

WE REALLY GET FITS OFF OFFLINE. IN REAL LIFE. NOT JUST TALKIN ON THE NET. WE DRESS LIKE COCAINE KINGPINS AT THE HEIGHT OF CARTEL SUCCESS. THESE OTHER NIGGAS DRESS LIKE UNDERCOVER COPS OR WEAR MATERIALS YOU’D FIND ON FURNITURE IN A FAILED REALITY TV STAR APARTMENT. NO WAVE DETECTED. 

WE FROM ST.LOUIS. WE GONE TAKEOVER. AIN’T SHIT NOBODY CAN DO BOUT IT. 

NEW POLITE COOLERY OCTOBER 5TH…… BYE DUSTY.